I wish I could take back the words I said…But
that idea is as futile as trying to catch feathers blowing away in the wind…the feathers are like words spoken in a moment of anger, or carelessness.
I asked the Lord to reveal a sin to me very recently. I just did not have peace in my walk, or in any aspect of my life lately. He didn’t reveal the sin that was in my heart right away, it took a couple of days, but when I seen it for what it was, I was struck with such a sickening feeling about it, and I repented of it immediately!
Now, I know that the Lord forgave the transgression, and even cleansed me from it, but in this case, He was requiring me to do something further…since it was the sin of bringing accusation against the brethren, against the pastor of the church I was attending…accusation based on assumptions made about a man with whom I have never even taken the time to get to know…and then using my words to fuel the fire of others who were less than impressed with the man, and with the church.
I even encouraged my own husband to quit attending church…My husband, by the way, whom I have prayed would join me in attending church for a long time!
So, why am I writing about this on here? you might be asking.
Because, my dear sisters and brothers, I want to let you know, that I felt that I could not continue to effectively minister to anyone unless I came clean about what I have done to the body of Christ, to part of our family…and ask you to please pray that the enemy, who is the accuser of the brethren will not feel free to ever use me in this way again!
You see, in all my years of being a Christian, I have tried to understand exactly what my gifts were in the body of Christ, and it was made very clear that my gift is to edify the church, to encourage my brethren to not lose hope and to understand that in His presence is fullness of Joy…so that when the enemy comes along to try to steal your hope and take away your joy…you would understand that out of Jesus flows the living Water of life eternal, and His Holy Spirit dwells within you guaranteeing access to His Holy presence 24/7…This hope and joy can not be taken unless it is given away! This is my ministry…this is what the Lord has equipped me to do!..And it is not of myself, but through Him all glory belongs!!
So, the enemy, through his subtle deceit, used me to act in opposition to my calling in Christ, and this was a sin done out of my own weakness and stupidity. There are no excuses for what I did. I am forgiven, God has forgotten this sin already, but I must remember to never let it happen again…Amen, and Thank you Jesus for this cleansing!~
So, although I may never catch all those elusive feathers that I so so carelessly released out into the wind…I am entrusting God to help me do some damage control in that situation….If only I can catch one of those feathers...